Whose job is it to fix school anxiety?

  When a child's struggling to attend school, parents can often feel that the responsibility to get that young person back into school is being placed very firmly onto them.   And that can feel incredibly frustrating, especially when parents can see that some of the things that might be making their young person anxious are things that are happening at school that parents have absolutely no control over.  

There was a recent systemic review that looked at parent-supported approaches to helping their young people get back into school when they were worried, and it highlighted something really important. This was, that supporting young people with school anxiety and attendance difficulties works best when a collaborative approach is adopted.  

The research highlighted the importance of parents, schools, children, and sometimes other professionals all working together collaboratively to support the young person. That meant really listening to the child and the family and actively involving them in decision-making. It means everyone sharing information about what might be making school difficult and what might help. And it involves schools thinking about what they could do differently or put in place to make school easier for that young person, as well as helping families access support from other appropriate professionals such as therapists or maybe even occupational therapists.

Of course, working together isn't straightforward and support often needed to be flexible and tailored to meet the individual needs of that young person and their families.

I think the key question is, "What's making school so difficult for that young person and what can each of us do to help?" That might mean changes at school or perhaps doing something different at home, involving another professional maybe, or simply making sure everyone is sharing information and working towards the same goals.

School anxiety and attendance difficulties really isn't something that parents can or should be expected to manage by themselves. The aim is to build a team around the child.   

If you're trying to understand what might be making school hard for your young person, you can download my free school anxiety checklist. It can help you think through what might be going on for your young person. You can download it here. 

Here's a link to the research: Dilkes, A., & Bond, C. (2026). Key features of parent supported approaches and interventions for children and young people experiencing anxiety and school attendance difficulties: a systematic review. European Journal of Special Needs Education, 1–18. https://doi.org/10.1080/08856257.2026.2642327