School Anxiety is NOT your fault!

If your child's worried about school, it is very unlikely to be your fault. I know that many parents feel blamed or judged by others, sometimes by school staff, sometimes by other parents at the school gate, and sometimes even by people within your own family. And I know from speaking to many parents over the years, just how painful and isolating this can feel.

I've spoken to lots of young people in depth about their school-based worries, and I honestly can't think of a single child I've worked with where school anxiety has been caused by one simple single reason.

School anxiety almost always develops through a complex interaction between the child and their environment.

Some factors might relate to the child themselves, things like a strong preference for certainty, differences in social understanding, or difficulties with emotional regulation. And some factors might relate to the school setting. For example, a busy, noisy, crowded environment, strict expectations, bullying or even friendships fallouts. And some factors might be linked to life outside of school, such as physical or mental health, difficulties within the family or stressful life events such as a bereavement.

It is also important to recognise that neurodiversity can play a huge role. Autism ADHD and sensory processing differences often genuinely make school far more demanding - even if those differences haven't yet been formally identified or diagnosed.

If you are currently wondering what might be making school hard for your child, I've created a free school anxiety checklist. It's a gentle tool to help you explore the different factors that could be contributing, which is the first step to help you identify what your child might need.

You can download it here.